"experience is what you get when you didn't get what you wanted." -randy pausch

Friday, October 31, 2014

FULL PROOF: the banchee cry {happy hollowing}

i've got this banchee cry.
at least that's what sean named it when brennan was a tiny baby.
it's the most annoying noise on the planet.
my mouth makes this oval shape,
my voice goes up REEEEAlly high.
and my tongue flaps up and down.
but believe you me.
it will get ANY kid and ALL kids to look at the camera
i kid you not. 
it's full proof.
{above: getting the nose just right.}
{adding eyelashes 'cause "it's a GIRL!"}

and then i did the banchee cry:

see what i mean?

Thursday, October 30, 2014

the day it rained and sean called me bossy {day 5}

it rained.
on and off, hard, then less hard.
enough to where the kids wanted to live in the hot tub.
so natalie and i threw on our running shoes, and ran to the pier and back. 
actually we RAN to the pier, and then we walked back:)
the rain felt so good, and the salty ocean air in my lungs, there's just nothing better.
when we got back we slipped into our suits and sat in the rain on the beach until it stopped.
then we used up the very last of all our sunscreen reserves,
soaked up the graces of the afternoon sun one last time,
dove into the ocean one last time,
went in the hot tub one last time,
and showered off all the sand one last time.
except really, it took two weeks for me to get the last bit of sand out of my left ear,
and another week to sweep the last of it out of my laundry room.
boogy boarding and beach living souvenirs.
oh yeah:)
i think it's finally all gone.

after we put the kids to bed,
while i sorted the clean clothes from the dirty 
{tell me, why did i bring anything other than swimsuits and pj's???},
the boys went on a dirty dr depper run.
they gathered everything from the pinterest picture i texted them.
good times:)
then all 10 adults of us drank our dirties 
and talked about everything we loved about our 5 days at the beach.
things we wanted to do different next time,
things we wanted to keep the same,
and then we sang coom-biya, but not around the camp fire,
because we like to sing our favorite 80's songs around that.
with reese's smores.
i forgot to tell you we did that the second night on the beach,
with all the kids and babies.
we did.
it was pretty great.
smores and sand.
nothing more crunchy than that!
so there it is folks,
oceanside 2k14.
we came,
we saw,
we paddle surfed,
we wiped out,
we diritied our dr peppers,
we sunsetted,
and we sat on the patio every night with the loudest ocean waves,
the fullest of moons,
and the most humid salty ocean air.
i never used a hair dryer once,
and when i curled my hair for family pictures, it fell out in half an hour.
made me feel right at home,
and also reminded me why i never used to do my hair.
every day i went in the ocean,
and every day it felt amazing.
the thing i miss the most about the beach is diving into the crisp water 
when you're just a "titch" too hot up on the sandy beach.
i miss boogie boarding with brennan,
and shell searching with max.
i miss running from the waves with chase,
and kissing sean out on the break WITH tongue;)
you know, after he found me THE PERFECT shell for my necklace, 
which i still have not made yet. i can't wait to do this!
this was after the morning where i was mad at him for telling me i was bossy.
i love that man,
and i love that he "gets" me.
even when things aren't perfect.
especially on vacation when things aren't perfect.
i love the beach.
i love watching my babies and my lover on his paddle board on the beach.
until we meet again beach...
{when we opened the door in vegas,
all of chase's shame fell out onto the ground.
when i went to take a picture of it all, he started throwing more stuff out.
he was so proud of his mischief. red heads.}
we stopped about 10 times on the way home.
we stopped once on the way there.
it's like little bodies save up their pee for the car ride home,
and want you to stop every 30 minutes, JUST to see if you will.
even with all of those stops and constant diaper changes,
chase still peed through his diapers at every stop.
strip poker.
that's what we called it.
i blame the 6 oz Hi-C orange burst.
the end.
until we meet again!

take me to bed maverick or loose me forever {day 4 at the beach}

being the northern california bred girl i am,
not only did i grow up thinking that all ocean water on the west coast was cold and wet suit requiring,
but i also thought that warm sunny beaches like hawaii could only be found in hawaii.
now, if you're not from california maybe you don't know that the north and south of california are basically two different states.
everything is completely opposite from the weather, to the culture, and the sports teams you root for.
so proud of my giants on this fine thursday morning.
so anyway, when we were walking out on the oceanside pier,
i just couldn't get over the fact that the ocean was so big.
and there i was standing in the middle of it.
watching the giant swells come in a out from the middle of it.
and from both directions, the giant ocean just went out forever in all ways!
i spent my life watching them from the shore, in the shelter of the little small bays and coves, standing in the fog, with my sweatshirt, jeans, and flip fops on, freezing my buns, except in the month of may where it's actually warm in half moon bay, and even then i still didn't like getting in the freezing water.
but this day on the oceanside pier,
i saw the ocean in a different way.
a massive, swelling, giant way.
the waves weren't breaking the further out we got,
so it was just the swells coming in,
and it was beautiful, and quiet in a whole new way that i had never in all those years noticed before.
also it was extra warm and sunny IN OCTOBER, so that was pretty great too.
max picked her nose most of the way out,
and the kids rode their scooters around the crowds like crazy people.
chase only wanted to push his little car on the way out,
so i think we bribed another kid to push it all the way back.
have you ever taken 10 kids and 9 adults to lunch before?
god bless our server at ruby's.
also, god bless my dr pepper cookies and cream ice cream float 
that i stole chase's whipped cream and put in mine.
when we got back from the pier, the boys snorkeled for sea shells 
and found these fancy ones that all the women wanted to take home for necklaces,
so the next two days was all about finding one for everyone.
by the end of the trip, everyone, including some of the little girls, 
had their prized necklace-to-be possessions,
wrapped in paper towels, and protected safely in plastic cups for the car rides home.
right at the end of the day, the water calmed down and sean headed out for his daily run on the paddle board. when he came back to shore, he road the wave in like some born and raised Polynesian.
at which point i yelled out to him,
"take me to bed maverick 
or loose me forever!!!!!" 
i mean really, there's nothing more fiiiiiine than your man coming in surfing on his paddle board.
it STILL has me all hot and worked up.
mmmmm mmmmm mmmmm.
but my favorite time of the entire day was when i caught sean and brennan on the back porch at sunset. just staring at each other and laughing.
and it reminded me of when brennan was a newborn baby,
and sean would hold him out on his arm.
mostly brennan would just scream 'cause that's basically all he did as a baby,
but every once and awhile he would coo and smile at sean.
oh baby brennan!
i wish he hadn't screamed so much.
this night i think they were talking about farts,
or butts or something, 
but it didn't even matter because those two boys smiling at each other just made me happy happy happy!
also, the sunset was pretty great too.
oh beach, i miss you and your salty air.

Monday, October 27, 2014

letters to Emily {feeling sorry for yourself, Switzerland, & God LOVES you}

Hello my Dear Emily Gibson,

I am completely sorry I haven't written you yet.  Well, these last few months have been the hardest/funnest/craziest months I have had in a while, which call for a lot of entertainment for you to read, I am sure of it.  It all started with Bryce leaving for Boston USA.  I was very sad to have him leave for a whopping three weeks.  But I was ready to pull up my sleeves and get down to the grind of life with my two kids living on the third floor, no elevator, and carrying Smithy down and up (oh UP, how I dislike UP) the stairs.  Bryce is always the one to carry Smith.  I usually do it if I have to, and it's fine, but Bryce is the carrier, if you will.  So it didn't seem so bad, and then conference weekend came.  I didn't do so well that weekend, unhealthy and negetive thoughts that came sweeping through my mind, and I did the horrible thing that no woman should do and ......felt sorry for my self.  Never do this!!!!!!!  It is a downward spiral of unhealthy thoughts that get you NO WHERE.  Well, maybe somewhere between a rock and hard place, but no where you want to be!  I walked my two kids to woman's conference thinking, "I don't even want to go, they won't tell me anything I need to hear, it's going to be the same stuff, which I like, but I don't even want to feel the spirit.  Why am I walking to the train with my two kids to go to womans conference?  Why I am doing this?"  I was convinced going was something I needed to to, but something I didn't want to do and was mad and sad at myself.  Then I got there and I was significantly late, and happened to walk in to President Uchdorf (the silver fox)  saying this:

"He not only knows what is best for you; He also anxiously wants you to choose what is best for you."

And this:

"And God knows of your successes; though they may seem small to you, He acknowledges and cherishes each one of them. He loves you for extending yourself to others. He loves you for reaching out and helping others bear their heavy burdens—even when you are struggling with your own.
He knows everything about you. He sees you clearly—He knows you as you really are. And He loves you—today and always!"
My soul needed to hear and feel those words.  I was humbled and grateful for a Heavenly Father who personally knows me.  And cares about me.  I hate the thought of going through trials to learn lessons.  Self pity is the worst companion to have when you are going through a trial.  Do not feel so sorry for your self!  Don't do it Beth Don't do it Beth.  Anyway, Enough about that.  I  feel like I am just rambling about when Bryce was gone and when he came home....OH BOY!  Was I a happy woman!  I was so happy I decided we should all go to Switzerland!!!  Aahhhh!  Heaven on earth Emily.  That place is so wonderful, everyone around here can't get enough of me saying how amazing Switzerland is.  The cows and the bells you hear on the cows EVERYWHERE you go, and it's true, their dairy there is the best you have ever tried in  your life.  And the people are so nice and oh how I love Switzerland, I actually love it so much I am reading Heidi right now, I am such a dork.  But seriously I really love it there.  Bear starts kindergarten (preschool in the states, but here they call it kindergarten) and it is so fun to hear the kids and the teachers talk to him in German....it made me think, maybe I could send you some videos of them speaking and you can show Brennan's class or something.  I don't know.  I hope you are having a good week and I can't wait to hear from you again!!!

Thursday, October 23, 2014

letters to Beth {my dryer smells like the GIRAFFE HOUSE & forget looking at the camera}

{i took this picture because i couldn't get anyone to sit and look at me at the same time, and chase was crying, and so sean came over and flew him around like an airplane, and then all of a sudden i realized, THIS is the picture. forget looking at the camera. i don't think october has EVER looked as beautiful in my yard as it has this year. i'm in heaven, and chase matches all of the colors!}

Dear Beth,
Good morning sunshine!!! How are you this fine October morning? I am well, and I hope you are also. It is finally really cold here in Utah in the mornings. So cold, that it requires a coat, but you can still wear your flip flops and jammies and be fine when getting kids off to school. Except Brennan left his sweatshirt at school yesterday, so i just sent him off with a long sleeve shirt and shorts, because remembering TWO sweatshirts to bring home {the one he left yesterday, and an extra one from today} would just be too much for him. so i gave him a kiss, and sent him off to his heated classroom school, hoping that being just a little cold walking in would remind him to make an effort to remember his sweatshirt. i am the nicest, don't you think? it is really warm by the end of the day, so we're not quite ready for pants, which is great because i still haven't had his pants hemmed yet. i think i can push it another two weeks, which means i will wait about three weeks before i desperately need to have his hemmed pants ready to go. sigh. this is me, take it or leave it.

so my dyer is stinky. did you know this is a thing? i didn't know it was a thing. i throw a cup of vinegar in my washing machine every other month or 6 months or so, whenever i remember, and the thing is going on 10 years strong and doesn't even stink, but the dryer, well, it smells like the giraffe house at hogle zoo. do you remember what that smells like? it's pretty much awful. so anyway, i looked on pinterest, and a stinky dryer IS actually a thing. you just clean out that silver astronaut vent thing, and vwallah it's not supposed to stink anymore. so i was explaining all of this to sean, and how it HAS been 10 years, so i should just probably run on down to home depot this morning and buy a new one, and all of a sudden he was all "THE SUNFLOWERS!!!" and that's when it hit me too. IT WAS THE SUNFLOWERS. see, sean worked so hard in the yard last weekend. he's amazing. i love him!!! he pulled out all of the tomato bushes, cucumbers, the strawberries i forgot to tell him to leave him {i just don't think i'm meant to grow strawberries, as this is the third year i've failed}, the peppers, the zucchini, the green beans, and the watermelon that never grew. it was amazing! he has our yard looking like a first class blue ribbon winner, all ready for winter, and since he's such an organized, neat and tidy guy, he lined up what wouldn't fit into the garbage cans along the side of the house in a neat and tidy stack so that after the next garbage day all of the excess can be neatly placed in the freshly emptied garbage can, conveniently RIGHT next to the dryer output vent. then it rained, and OH how i LOVE the rain!!! except, do you KNOW what wet, rotting broccoli and sunflowers and squash plant smells like? GIRAFFE HOUSE at the hogle zoo:) yep, it does. so last night at like 10:30pm sean was moving all of the rotting sunflowers for me, and squash plant, and broccoli, to the front of the house where the blue birds will come and feed off of them until our bulk waste removal next month, or until we get it dumped week by week into the garbage cans. this is the one time of year i wish i had 6 garbage cans. so this morning, i was all excited, and hoping my clothes were going to smell like kirkland dryer sheets and NOT giraffe house, and it still smells like the giraffe house, BUT, not to fret! i think it still needs some time. also, i'm thinking i might just replace that 10 yr old astronaut vent just because it feels like it's the least i could do for my dryer since it's run so well for me all this time, and it's probably been jealous of the washer and all of its vinegar treatments and stuff.
so that my friend is what i was thinking about as i was folding our underwear in the laundry room this morning. there are the most beautiful colors all around everywhere i look. "i'm so glad i live in a world where there are octobers!!!" i'm also really glad i live in a world with children.

i give you, my baby that looks like autumn:
{see what i mean, trying to get them looking at the camera is overrated. i have about 30 more of these with each child crying at one point or another. that was until daddy saved us all with the flying airplane trick. works like a charm every time. forget looking at the camera!}

happy october my sweet friend! is bryce home yet? how are the boys? what are you cooking to bring in fall? i'm making pumpkin chocolate chip cookies this morning and thinking of you! i love you!

Wednesday, October 15, 2014

the day we saw dolphins {day 3}

this was the day we saw dolphins.
a whole pod.
there's something magical about dolphins being so close to you off the shore.
the surfers stop surfing, and just sit with their feet dangling off the sides of their boards, 
and they all flag each other down to watch the dolphins
as they come within feet of them going by.
time just sorta stops as the mystical creatures slowly glide in and out of the water,
and we all sat on the sand wishing we were the surfers sitting out there on boards touching the dolphins as the swam by.
every time their fins would come up my heart would skip.
it never gets old.
also, i tried to snorkel for shells like my brother in law kenny because he was finding some AWESOME necklace making ones, but about three wipe outs later i called it quits and went back to boogie boarding, as there is nothing more fun 
than getting a really good wave right in front of your kids.